Jessica Marie

My Life is Finally Going Somewhere!

2011-09-21T20:25:00.000-07:00

Hey my blogger readers! How has everything been going for everyone? I hope everything is well with everyone!!! So much has happened in the past month and a half, as usual. One day I will keep this updated, but until then, you'll just have to anticipate my wonderful posts!

To start off this blog I would like to say that I have a real life boyfriend, who lives in the same city as me, and is just absolutely, the best thing that has happened to me in a while!

I've known him since we were kids. Just about 9th grade, haha. We go way back.. here I'll show you.. It's kind of a blurry picture, but I guess it'll do! haha.

Oh man have things changed since then! Any who this all started with me being slightly rude to him on facebook. He started commenting on all of my pictures and then one day he wrote me a message, and asked me when we were going to hang out, I never responded, so he wrote this...

This all eventually led to him asking me if I wanted to go to the Eric Church & Toby Keith concert, which I said yes to! We had so much fun together!! It was a blast here are some photos from that evening.

After that night we just kept hanging out and eventually about a week and a half later we started dating!

He's everything I want and more! I just am loving every bit of this new adventure!

Now onto the other part about my life finally going somewhere!! I finally got a phlebotomy job (what i went to school for!) I'm so excited to be working at quest diagnostics!!! I just can't wait!

Well bloggers, I'm going to Sea World and to a Dodgers game with my man this weekend, so I need to get going! I promise I'll update as soon as I get back!!

Also if you want to follow me on a daily basis catch me on my other fun world wide web things I do.

Twitter : Bellajess8
Instagram: jessicagreco
Pinterest: Bellajess8

Catch ya later!

xoxo Jess

so many battles.

2011-08-03T12:18:00.000-07:00

So much stuff has happened in the past almost two months. Man I'm such a failure at this sometimes. It's so bad. haha.

Before I went to California with my family, I went to the pool a few times with my friends from work. I just love them all soooo much, like my new little family!

Well I went to Coronado with my family, it was so much fun! I couldn't of asked for a better vacation with them, and getting to see all my dads close friends was awesome too!

After that I drove to Wyoming! It was a 13 hour drive, but definitely worth it for the people I was going to see. I had such a fun time there. I even gave Zat a little birthday surprise, which he enjoyed for the most part, besides the fact that I forgot to get sour cream for his enchiladas. I'll never forever that again.

Let's see, I came home from Wyoming on the 12th, and then the Harry Potter Premiere was on the 15th! It was a pretty dang good movie! It's so crazy knowing that it's over though, and it's also slightly depressing at the same time.

Since then I've just been working like crazy! Trying to get my savings account back to what it was looking like before my vacation! One day on my day off though, I chased a duck and tried to catch her so she wouldn't get ran over by a car, it was a pretty funny day. After that it was my friend Ryan's 21st birthday so we went to Revolver and the Rio Pool the next day. It was fun because I got to spend time with my girls!

I have been driving myself crazy lately with this subject/issue that's been on my mind. Hopefully in the next three days I'll have it all figured out and I can stop worrying about it and move on with my life in whatever direction it chooses to go. Blahh being a grown up is tough stuff. So many things to choose and decide!

Up next on the adventures of Jessica; include pool with friends tomorrow, Friday I'm getting another tattoo, Saturday I'm going to the Toby Keith Concert!! & Sunday, I'm not sure but Zat comes in to town this week too, so maybe I'll see him too. It's going to be a fun week, so don't plan on reading more until then!

some stories are happy, some are sad, & some are just confusing, part 2.

2011-06-16T00:03:00.000-07:00

So the story continues with Lilly and Talon, after all her curiousness about how he felt she decided to not ask the questions, afraid of what the answers might tell. That same week she found out the girl he’d been talking to was now his girlfriend. She was devastated, not because he had a girlfriend, well sort of, but more because she had to find out through facebook, and that someone who was her “good friend” didn’t just come out and tell her. Talon’s excuse was that he thought it wouldn’t show up in his news feed, but it did. She was upset that he was dating a girl who lived in another state, and thought he was so stupid for trying to make a long distance relationship work. She also decided to tell him all of this. Let’s just say Talon was NOT happy with her, and her opinion. He told her to basically get over it and deal with it. So after getting into an argument about something she couldn’t help, she apologized for being bitchy.
Lilly tried to distance herself from Talon since he had a new girlfriend, but he didn’t try to distance himself from her. He still tried to talk to her every day. It made her happy, until the weekend would come, she knew she wouldn’t hear from him especially if he was out of town to see his girlfriend. After that weekend though a lot of things changed, his attitude about stuff changed and Lilly just knew something was oddly wrong. He asked her a few random questions, and she started to assume things, which she knew she shouldn’t but she did anyways. The questions she wanted to ask she just knew she wouldn’t.
Things were changing though like she thought. A few days after that weekend she found out some stuff, things she didn’t want to hear, and things she was happy to help out with. Even though some of the stuff she found out she didn’t like, it didn’t change how she felt about him at all. All she really wanted at this point was for him to be happy no matter what.
That same night Lilly had a very weird dream, she dreamt that she texted him and asked him what he was up to, and he said that he was going to break up with his girlfriend, and that he wasn’t too happy about it, then she looked up in the crowd and saw him, he smiled and walked right passed her, and then she woke up. It was a very strange dream, and since she’d been having weird dreams lately she decided to tell him. Talon also thought it was strange.
He played an evil trick on her that night, he told her to “Open her mouth and shake an imaginary salt shaker into it. He said you can still taste salt at the back of your throat.” She then attempted to try it in her car, (go ahead try it guys) …… now think about what it looks like and why would you be able to still taste salt? Hahah He has a dirty mind. She was so angry with him for like a split second, but was so happy that she was alone in her car when attempting this. Blonde moment for her, for sure.
The next day, she got a text from Talon, it said, “you got your wish, it didn’t work out. Happy? She doesn’t want me.”
Lilly was speechless, she didn’t expect them to break up, or for him to practically blame her dream for it. Subconsciously she wanted them to break up, why wouldn’t she? She liked him, and didn’t want him to be with anyone but her. I mean it seems selfish, but that’s what she wanted.
Her response to him was sentimental. She told him that she was sorry that they had broken up, but that he was an amazing person, and for her to not want him was silly, and that it was ultimately her loss. Talon was of course still upset, but he appreciated what she said. Lilly asked if there was anything she could do for him, and he just said, no and that he wanted to be alone.
They were honest with each other about so much stuff after that. Bluntly honest. Lilly felt better about things, like maybe things would get better. Then one day when they were talking on the phone, Talon told her how he was still going out of town that weekend, and she asked why, and his now ex-girlfriend decided that she wanted to keep everything the same, and just didn’t want to have the title. Lilly was confused, the girl he liked didn’t want to call him her boyfriend but wanted him to be up there with her all the time, and keep things the same, and he was okay with it. Since when is a girl so great that she gets to have her cake and eat it too. Lilly didn’t think this was cool at all. In fact she pretty much told him he was stupid again, but in a nicer way. He didn’t know what to do or what to say, I mean he liked the girl a lot. This just made Lilly like him less. Unfortunately.
The weekend went by and she didn’t hear anything till Monday, he was finally coming home, but recently Talon had been experiencing some really bad migraines, migraines to the point where he passes out. She was talking to him on his way home, and he said he had to pull over because he was puking from his head hurting so bad. Lilly got really worried, she didn’t want him to pass out when he was driving or have anything bad happen to him. She talked to him till he made it home.
The next day they were talking about how she had this bright idea that they should take a back packing trip through Europe for a month or two. He asked who would come.
She said,” well I just thought I’d go to just have fun, but I think I need someone else to go with me, and I thought of you.
Talon goes, “There might be nudity.”
Lilly then goes and says, “I’ve came to the conclusion that we’re just friends and we’ll only ever be just friends, so if there was then cool.”
It made no sense at all, she basically just confused everyone. She wanted him, but was denying it. She then explained that if there was nudity that it’d be because they were changing and that’s it.
Talon then goes and says, “Yah I’m pretty sure I would be all over that…”
She replied with, “I don’t see you being all over me.”
He goes, “why?”
She goes, “I just can’t imagine you doing that.”
Talon goes, “okay then”
She responded with, “I think I know how you feel about me, and I’m sure it could happen, but at the same time I can’t imagine it happening, even if I’ve dreamed of it.”
Lilly didn't know how he felt though, she thought she did, but she had never asked. She was always afraid of his response.
Talon responded with, “If I didn’t think it would possibly ruin the way things are between us now, which I happen to like, I would totally have sex with you.”
Lilly goes, “That’s the difference between you and me.”
T; “what?”
L; “I couldn’t ever just have sex with you.”
T; “wow way to make me feel bad.”
L; “I’m not trying to make you feel bad by any means, It’s a lot more complicated than I realized it was.”
In that moment and time she realized so many things. So many things. She already knew how much they both cared about each other and how much they both appreciated each other. She knew that right then and there though, that she definitely cared more about him than he did about her. She knew that the other guys she tried talking to were just to fill the void of not being able to actually be with him. Those guys she talked to were possibly just there to try to make him jealous also. None of them were even close to Talon though, none of them could measure up to the weird bond they shared. She wanted to be the other girl, the one he wanted, but she just wasn’t, and she was probably never going to be that girl. It killed her to admit that they were just friends. She couldn’t ever imagine being anything less though.
How do you admit to someone exactly how you feel about them. How do you tell your friend that you can’t picture life without them being a part of it. What happens when you both move on and find significant others, will you ever wonder what if? What if I would of just taken that chance and just tried to see if it would work. Why do we never see what’s standing in front of us until it’s out of our reach?
Talon kept having bad headaches, he ended up having a seizure, and passing out, and had to go to the hospital. Lilly made him promise he’d go, and he did. She was so worried about him all day at work, it drove her crazy not knowing if he was okay. They did a ton of tests, and nothing was figured out. Talon went home from the hospital, and Lilly was relieved to know he was okay. Really really relieved.
Their commitment to make sure each other is okay at all times, is really sweet. It’s the kind of compassion you don’t really see now of days. People just want to snoop into others’ lives, and then judge them for whatever they’re up to. Whether it’s joining a new religion, getting married, or having a baby. Everyone always just wants to be in each other’s lives for a second. Where Talon and Lilly are involved in each other’s lives at all times. It makes me wish there were more people out there that could communicate and understand each other the way they do.

This story is to be continued…..

it's time.

2011-06-14T22:30:00.000-07:00

I'm just going to come out and say it.

I want a boyfriend.

I'm so over talking to guys, and it never going anywhere. I'm over talking to guys who just want to try to have sex with me, because it's not going to happen. I just want something real, and I want to be able to open up to someone again. I want to feel again. It's been three years since I've had a real steady relationship, and I think I'm finally ready to try again.

I deserve someone whose going to treat me like a lady. I won't settle for less than I deserve.

the end.

Tattoos & boys, boys, boys!!

2011-06-06T13:55:00.000-07:00

So if you didn't know, you will soon, I have three tattoos. I have stars on my hips that I got when I was 17, each star represents a member of my family, you may be saying there is only 5 people in your family though, but I would then tell you, don't forget about Jack (the dog) he lived to be 14, and he's still a part of my family. Then when I was 19 I got my tattoo on my wrist for my grandma, I always told everyone that she was My Nanny, and that's why I had that written there, the very colorful butterfly represents her presence that she still has with me, and that her body was set free of the pain she was in. The third and newest tattoo is on my side, and it says "Above all else guard your heart, For it affects everything you do." it's a verse from Proverbs 4:23 in the Bible. Depending on which version you read it will say something different, but I liked this way it was said. Anyways this is such a powerful verse for me, I've said it before, and it really is the way I live my life, I always protect myself from getting hurt, or at least I always try too, it's a big downfall of mine but it also is a good thing too. Here's a picture of all three of them!

Sometimes I'm just slightly confused by the opposite sex, and I feel as if I'll never win the game they are trying to play. I have wants and needs of my own, and I have standards that need to be followed.
Here's the deal, I like when a guy asks me out on a date, and takes me to dinner or to do something fun. I don't like kissing that guy on that first date, I usually like to wait till the second and sometimes the third. It's just how I roll. Now there is an exception and you might be an exception to the rule. If I've already kissed you in the past, then you would be the exception, since obviously it's not the first time we're hanging out or anything.
I do not like when a guy is super pushy with me. If I tell you to stop trying to kiss me, then dammit stop. Do not try to push yourself on me, it is the biggest turn off ever and I just won't kiss you at all.
I'm a lady and I want to be treated like one is that so hard to ask?
I can't win with the LDS guys, and I can't win with the not LDS guys. Where do I go wrong? lol.

It seems like to me that all the guys that treat me right don't want me the way I want them, and all the guys that don't treat me right, are such a dang turn off that after hanging out with them a few times I don't like them anymore.
This all makes me want to just change my number, delete my facebook, and move out of state, but I think it's a universal thing not just a Vegas thing.
Growing up is so tough sometimes.

some say....

2011-05-24T20:58:00.000-07:00

Some people say beauty is in the eye of the beholder, what does that really mean? Does it mean that my beauty is what I think it is, or the person that should be attracted to me is the holder of my beauty.
hmmm.. I'm not sure, but I'd love to know what that quote or saying means to you.

Some people say that a best friend is someone who you can confide in without feeling judged. Some say that they will be there for you no matter what the circumstances or how much trouble the both of you could be in.
What does a best friend mean to you?
To me a best friend is someone who you can show your whole world to, and know that at the end of the day they will still love you the same way they did before you showed them that world. They're the first person you want to tell the bad news or the good news to. They're the ones that will sit there and eat ice cream with you even if it's breaking their diet, because they know it's helping you get over whatever problem is bothering you that day. They are the only person who gets you, and gets exactly where you're coming from all the time. They're almost like your twin. I have one of these, we've only been friends for a little over a year, but I can honestly say we know absolutely everything about each other... everything. There are no secrets.

Some people say that you can't be "just friends" with a guy because it never works like that.
How do you feel about this?
I feel like I have one guy friend who is just my best friend who I can do the above statements with. He's amazing, and even though he gets mad at me for things, it's okay because he loves me no matter what.

Some say "you always want what you can't have."
Why is this true?
What's the right steps to achieving what you "can't have?"
Somehow I just wish life was easier, and things were just handed to me. But then I remember that I wouldn't be the strong willed individual that I am. I wouldn't know the need to fight for something that I want.

Some say that I'm a loud mouth.
They're right.
I keep secrets. I share good news. I tell a guy if I like him. I just tell it how it is. There is nothing wrong with having confidence. It should be admired.

Some say I make decisions without thinking sometimes.
They are also right.
Sometimes I jump five feet ahead of myself. I never realize my decision till a week later, and then I regret it for a day and then I move on. It's life. It was a choice I made, and that's that. You can only make the future better you cannot change your past.

Some people say not enough. Some people choose the wrong choice. Some people don't realize they've made the wrong move until it bites them in the butt. Some people just don't get it, until it's too late.
I hope it won't be too late. I hope that they figure it out before they make a big mistake. I really hope they see and know the difference between the right choice and the comfortable choice.

"Above all else guard your heart, for it affects everything you do." I say this saying a lot, and I remind myself of it daily. I always guard my heart. I never let anyone in to break it. Is it sad that I've never been truly in love? Is it sad that I can't let myself open up to any guy fully. I deserve to let myself be loved, because I'm so good in loving in return.

That's my next goal for some to say.... wow Jessica looks incredibly happy, and I'm so happy for her.

I want good for all. I want everyone to be happy. I want people to be able to open up to each other and fall in love, because it's all a learning experience we all need to go through. Don't be scared, just let it happen.

Because at the end of the day.... All you need is love.

some stories are happy, some are sad, & some are just confusing...

2011-05-16T23:07:00.000-07:00

Once upon a time there was a girl named Lilly who answered a few questions for a certain guy named Talon. He was appreciative of her for answering them honestly. She had a few other intentions of her own for him. So Lilly decided to keep talking to him. As she started talking to Talon she realized that he was actually a decent guy. So those intentions slowly disappeared when she got to know him. As they started talking, they learned a whole lot about each other. And as every normal girl does she started to like him. He opened up to her about liking certain things that he wouldn't dare to tell anyone else in case of embarrassment. The things that drove him to be crazily excited, were things she as well was interested in. It reminded her of her childhood, and the classes that used to excite her. They ventured off into different discussions about things, from the church, to past relationships, goals, dreams, they even tried to see who was the better rapper of the two. They even saw past each others flaws, and tried to make each other feel better about them.
The only problem about this fairytale was that it was all a phone fantasy, everything was done through text messages and phone calls, none of it was in person. Whenever they tried to plan something Talon was always making up excuses or had something else to do. Eventually though, he got the courage to ask her to go do something with him, they kept their plans, until something horrible actually happened. Later that night they did see each other for just a few minutes. Totally not on the best circumstances though, unfortunately.
From that day forward Lilly just thought, maybe it's just not meant to be, maybe this is all it's ever suppose to be.
They still continued to talk about everything everyday. He passed his time with his friends and his hobbies, and she tried to pass her time by seeing her friends, and trying to talk to different guys, but no matter what they were never as interesting as he was to her.
Lilly decided to "man up" and tell him that she thought that she might have a weird crush on him. Seeing as how they'd never really hung out, that is why she thought it was so weird. Now of course Talon, was "shocked" he wasn't expecting that to happen, but he told her that he admired her for her courage to come out and say that. He avoided saying anything else, she knew then that he didn't feel the same way, but that was okay.
One day they happened to just show up at the same party, it was extremely random, she wanted to ignore him, and just forget that he was even there, but she couldn't. She got the courage to go up to him and talk to him in person for the second time in her life. They talked till the party was over, about the same things they did over the phone. Surprisingly enough it was like nothing was different between them, everything was still the same and it was comfortable for the both of them. The night drew to an end and that was that.
Time went by and the only time they ever caught a glimpse of each other was when they both happened to be at church, but they never talked, not in person at least. They could be two feet away from each other in the same room, and still only text message. I know this seems pathetic, I completely agree, it seems like two people playing cat and mouse except no one’s really chasing the other person.
Lilly eventually started to seek actual advice from him about guys, I mean if he wasn’t ever going to say that he liked her, or ever want to hang out with her, she might as just consider him her best guy friend. She would ask him advice and then he would ask who it was, once she would tell him, he’d immediately go search for him on FB and then would judge the guy and say things like, he seems like douche bag, or like a tool, or yah he seems cool I guess. Almost as if he was jealous. Which I think was her intention of telling him in the first place. If he knew she was looking maybe he’d actually make a move.
Then something weird happened. Talon told Lilly he had something to tell her. He told her that he met someone and he felt like he needed to tell her that. Not that he needed her permission or anything but to just tell her. She was of course upset, but happy that he actually found someone and was trying to move on from his previous relationship.
The weirdness continued when he asked Lilly to go get ice cream with him, that he owed her, for all the times he bailed on her. She of course thought he’d bail again, but he didn’t. They went out to go get ice cream and they laughed and talked the whole time. They both had a blast making fun of each other and other people. They were like two peas in a pod. Up until they started talking about the girl he was interested in, and even though she didn’t really want to hear about it, she thought the friendly thing to do was ask. The fact that he was taking his time to talk to her on the phone for hours at night and that he was going to drive six hours to see this girl every weekend kind of sickened her. She wondered why he liked this girl, what was so great about her. She wondered just why she wasn’t good enough.
Things still stayed the same though after their night out. They still talked every day, and they still could tell when there was something wrong with the other person, or when the other person was happy or sick or sad. It’s so weird to say that they knew each other through text messages not very many people do.
Lilly then went to the movies she went and saw “Something Borrowed” She’s the type of person where she tried to relate herself to the characters and she did. She related to Darcy. She understood where she was coming from and how Darcy never took chances, but Lilly took a chance. Then she thought of the character Dex and put Talon in his shoes. Guys don’t like to come out and say how their feeling, most of the time they don’t until the last minute which is exactly what Dex did in the movie. Darcy wanted to be Dex’s first choice, not his second, so she waited until he figured it out. Lilly just wished that Talon was a little bit more like Dex, and that he wouldn’t realize what he was missing until it was too late. So she wanted to tell him this and she picked up the phone to call him, there was no answer, she left a text and called it a night.
When she woke up she didn’t want to tell him what she felt so strong about the night before because now it just seemed silly. He eventually got it out of her, and he told her she was brave for even attempting to call, because he would never do anything like that.
It made her think, it made her wonder. Wondering never got anyone anywhere, and to ask the most important question just seemed too earth shattering. So the questions all still remain, how does he feel, is he just dangling her on a string in case nothing ever works out, does he like her and he’s just too scared to answer, or does he just need a friend who gets him. Whatever the case may be they’re really good friends, and they are there for each other, and sometimes that’s all that matters.
This story is to be continued…..

i can only play nice for so long.

2011-05-16T22:17:00.000-07:00

you know when you have a friend of the opposite sex, and then they get a significant other, and then all of the sudden they can't be your friend anymore. SO STUPID. let me repeat. DUMBEST THING EVER!!!! Especially when they've been such an important part of your life. Makes me the angriest I've ever been. He's so brainwashed by her. It's pathetic. Sometimes being LDS and the decisions people make, make me so angry. Mostly it's just him. Have fun with your wife, I hope she's everything you ever wanted. blahhhh.

New Outlook

2011-04-24T22:34:00.000-07:00

Soul Surfer was such an amazing movie! Go check it out!

So sometimes I get confused and I say too much or not enough. Sometimes I choose the wrong guy. Sometimes I let the good ones get away. Sometimes I look too fat. Sometimes I take to many pictures of myself. Sometimes, sometimes, sometimes. Well one thing I know for certain, is I'm Jessica, and I'm a happy and healthy 21 year old who likes to have a good time.

& that's all that matters

go ahead and judge away.

2011-04-21T18:38:00.000-07:00

Writing is such a therapy for me sometimes. Sharing it with others is just another form of therapy. So much has happened since I last posted. I got my needs out of the way. Yay! With those needs being taken care of I stumbled upon a lot more confusing things in my life.

I have a new job! I work at the PBR Rock Bar & Grill as a hostess, at Planet Hollywood in the Miracle Mile Shops. It’s an amazing job, with some truly amazing people, and I’m finally ready to make a new family here at my new job. Oh & I’m a hostess, and I make way more than what I was making at Best Buy! & I’m full time, so I’ll be able to afford to move out and take off one of my things on my wants list. Yay!!

I got my free adrenaline rush. I also got to get out of Vegas for a whole week. My friend Zat asked me to go to Wyoming with him for a week. It was so much fun, and I snapped back from being depressed, and I realized how important my true friends and my family were to me. I’ll never make the same mistake again to take them for granted or to ever judge them again. They are who they are and they love me for me. Anyways, it was an amazing week, with an amazing guy, who deserves nothing but the best things in life. I can’t wait to see him again soon.

Onto a few more confusing situations that are all bottled up inside of me, that I just need to get out.

I have somewhat of a friend, I guess I would call him that I suppose, any who, we’ve never really ever hung out, we’ve just always talked on the phone or texted, for about the past 6 months. The one time we did have something planned something terrible happened in our lives. One of our mutual friends passed away. It was definitely devastating for him, and me. We’ve had some pretty amazing and pretty deep conversations, and we both know each other really well now. Makes me wonder what’s stopping him from ever asking me out, on a real date. I dunno, maybe I just wasn’t ever his type, or he just was never that “in to” me. Whatever it may be, is just so weird to me. Anyways the other day he texted me and he was like I have something weird to tell you, and I said what, and he said I’ve met someone, and of course I was happy for him, that’s awesome, but I was kind of sad about it to. I told him though that I was happy and excited for him, and he shouldn’t of had a problem telling me, nor that it was necessary to tell me. Now that he’s done that, I feel like I should just back away and just stop talking to him. Then I realize that that’s all it ever was, just us talking. Sharing mutual conversation. I just liked him a little bit more than I should of. Makes me a little sad.

Lastly we have the infamous soldier. I won’t use his name for real because we’ve gone public with a lot of stuff, and so if you know me you’ll know who he is, and if not then oh well. So everyone who is a real friend of mine knows that we made up a rumor about us being married when I turned 21, for some reason I like freaking people out, makes life a little bit more fun and exciting. Well when all that stuff happened I did actually like him, just not enough to marry him. Now he’s home from Iraq, and we’ve been hanging out, and I don’t know what to do. He talks about how he’s going to marry me, and how all this stuff is going to happen. Once again I’m a firm believer that long distance doesn’t work. The other night he just asks me to be with him, or at least wait for him. There is no way in hell that I can do that. No honestly there’s no way I will ever wait for a guy. I’m not that girl. I can’t do that. I need attention, and five months is a really long time. Some people will disagree, but I can’t and won’t do that, nor will I promise a solider that. I’ve done it before, and it was stupid and it ruined a really good friendship I had, and that person will probably hate me for forever for that. I love him (soldier) a little bit more than I should but just because he is who he is, and I hate to lose him as a friend. Though after this he may not really like me too much. Oh well.

I know that there are some really great guys I’ve met, and I know that I’ve had plenty of opportunities to make things happen with them. It all goes back to who I actually want, or what I need. The only guy I truly think about every day is my texting friend guy. Which is once again I know so dumb. He just so much different than I am now, I’m still learning and having trial and error with what kind of person I want to be. I know that if I told him everything that I’ve been doing recently that he’d be disappointed. He’s just so caring and amazing, and I hate it.

Which brings me to who I am, the person who I rediscovered on my trip to Wyoming. I am Jessica, I do believe in God, in Christ our Savior, and I do strongly believe in Joseph Smith, the restoration of the true gospel of Jesus Christ, and I do love being a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, I believe in it for me. I believe for me and only me. I still though want to live my life the way I want to, and whoever is going to judge me for it can. I like tattoos, and casually drinking with my friends, and I enjoy dancing at clubs, I enjoy having a really good night with my boyfriend (if I ever had one) These are things that will never change, not right now at least, and if that means that I can’t do some of the things my other friends can do, then oh well. We all live through trial and error. This is my trial. I want to do things my way. I have so much on my mind. It kills me. None of this is even really important, it’s all silly. Why I worry about the things I do, bothers me.

I also hate how death brings people together. I hate how the person that just died in my life doesn’t even bother me. I hated him, for a very good reason. And even though they all know why, they’re still upset he’s gone. Ughhhhh I hate it.

I hate that so many terrible things have happened to me, I really hope some super good things start happening.

I’m ready for summer. I’m ready to be who I want to be. I’m ready to discover new things.

Ps. If this at all sounded really bad and like I was a super big player, I’m not. This stuff just all started happening at the same time, and became over whelming and now I don’t know what to do. I’m sorry to the guys who read this, if I wasn’t or haven’t been completely honest I’m sorry it’s just hard.

&& to the person earlier that called me a whore, next time don't be so anonymous about it. just come out and show who you really are.

wow

2011-04-21T15:26:00.001-07:00

somethings are better left unsaid. people are so completely rude.

A List of Wants and Needs

2011-03-24T16:46:00.001-07:00

Needs are always before wants.

I need a job.
Seriously. I no longer work at Best Buy. So
I'm in desperate need of a job.

I need a free adrenaline rush.
key word being FREE

I always have more wants than needs.

I want a really good camera.
So I can take really awesome photos.

I want a place of my own.
A place where I don't have to babysit, and I can make my own rules.

That's all.

"Snapped Photography"

2011-03-24T16:02:00.000-07:00

For more photo's like this or to have your photos done go to;

http://snappedphotography.photodeck.com/

Snapped Photography

2011-02-19T22:50:00.000-08:00

My friend Bethany took these to help start her portfolio, here are just a few of the photos that she shot of me!
Here is her link

http://snappedphotography.photodeck.com/

If you're at all interested in getting photos done, she's got way good prices, and she does all types of photos!

Photoshoots!

2011-02-11T17:02:00.000-08:00

So as of recent my friend Bethany is starting up her photography portfolio, and I've been privileged enough to do some of my wonderful friends' hair, and get even some of my own photos done.

They'll probably be up later on this weekend!! You'll all have to tell me if you like them or not!!

Nothing new has been going on in my life, still just the same old jessica!!!

So i'll chit chat with you all later!!

ponder this with me.

2011-02-03T14:36:00.000-08:00

the term it's not you, it's me.

how many times is that really the case? when someone say's i promise it's not you it's me, how often do you really think they're being honest.

sometimes I say that, and I am being honest. other times I say it and i'm not.

I really wish I could take my own advice and just tell the people I like that I like them, but somehow I fall short in my own confidence, and just chicken out, probably because I'm scared of rejection.

On the other hand though, if I have to tell you I like you, and it's not apparent already that I'm interested, you must be a very very silly boy, who needs to get a clue.

Also desperate guys, they kill me. i guess i forget that in the "Mormon Dating World" going on a second date with a guy is a really big deal. this i am just simply unaware of. usually the like 5th or 6th date is a big deal to me. That means that i've gotten to know you on a few different types of occasions and i'm ready to maybe move onto the next step and date you exclusively.

If you want to take me out, make sure the date is original and not something you've done since you were in high school with multiple other girls, it really makes me feel like poo, and not special in anyway.

If you're a guy and you're reading this and you're interested in me. Do not... I repeat do not text me everyone morning and tell me good morning beautiful, or goodnight gorgeous. It gets very annoying very quickly and it's a major turn off, especially because I'm probably not the only girl you're texting that to, and even if I am, don't do it.

One other do not. Biggest pet peeve in the world. If you are going to ask me out on a date, do not do it in a text message. Grow a pair, and pick up the phone that you pay for monthly and use the minutes that we both know you have a ton of, and ask me on the phone. The next guy to ask me out in a text, no matter if he's Channing Tatum hot, I will say no to.

Let me just say I love technology, but it is ruining the socialization aspect of life.

that's enough for me today.

-JG

I have been requested to write a new post.

2011-01-28T22:49:00.000-08:00

So everyone... I've been requested to write a new post. I'm assuming for a few reasons. haha.

Okay lets see this past week has been pretty good! I went to institute on Tuesday and learned more about the creation, which is just a beautiful thing all in itself. I love going to institute, because I didn't get to go to seminary in high school or anything like that, so it helps me learn!

Tuesday night me and my sister went and saw the movie No Strings Attached, with Ashton Kutcher and Natalie Portman.. It was amazing! I cried. haha. which is kind of pathetic but it was still really good.

Wednesday.... I worked and then came home and watched tv for most of the night. It was a boring night.

Thursday... OOOOHHHH Thursday! Well I went on a date on Thursday, with this stud named, Kyle. We went to the Burger Bar at the Manalaybay Place, for dinner. Then we went to see the Lion King show. It was absolutely amazing. I loved it! It was almost word for word from the movie.. well the important parts at least. Then after that he took me to this secret place by the Private Airport here in Vegas. Where he did the cutest thing ever. He laid down a blanket and then made hot cocoa, with this boy scout thing he had, and we watched the private jets fly over our heads. It was so cool, they were only like 30-50 feet above us, which is kind of scary but so awesome at the same time. It was an amazing date. Definitely the best one I've ever been on.

Then on Friday! I went to get my best friend Brianna, scriptures!!!!!!!! Yes I know so awesome!! I am so excited I hope she reads them every night! She's going to start coming to institute with me on Tuesdays which will be fun and nice! Then after that I went with my friend Beth to TownSquare and got some pretty sweet new clothes, as usual...shopping problem.. right here!! haha!

Tomorrow, my best friend Gary is coming into town with his girl friend!! Which is so exciting! We're all going to lunch! I'm also planning on going to DownEast Basics tomorrow. & Working... blahh!!

Then it'll be Sunday! Yay!!

Well that's enough for now!
-JG

all you need is trust, and a little bit of pixie dust!

2011-01-22T14:54:00.000-08:00

This quote I stumbled upon last night...

"When we say things like "people don't change" it drives scientist crazy because change is literally the only constant in all of science. Energy. Matter. It's always changing, morphing, merging, growing, dying. It's the way people try not to change that's unnatural. The way we cling to what things were instead of letting things be what they are. The way we cling to old memories instead of forming new ones. The way we insist on believing despite every scientific indication that anything in this lifetime is permanent. Change is constant. How we experience change that's up to us. It can feel like death or it can feel like a second chance at life. If we open our fingers, loosen our grips, go with it, it can feel like pure adrenaline. Like at any moment we can have another chance at life. Like ...at any moment, we can be born all over again." - Meredith Grey.

It really made me think about a lot of things. How history repeats itself. How new fashions come about but we're just reliving certain aspects of histories fashion before us.
This though really made me think about my past. My not so very proud of past that made me who I am today. It made me think about all my ex's who I sometimes still think about, and if I didn't think about them or compare them to anyone, I'd probably be a much happier person right now.
I need to not be scared to move on to more stable ground. I need to just feel that adrenaline rush like the quote says. I need to forget about them completely and what happened with them and move on.
I need to not worry about anyone in my past, and just worry about the people who have made it to my future. I need to get rid of old phone numbers, and delete way more people off facebook. I need to live in the now, not in the then.
I'm so thankful for the gospel and for the atonement. With out it I wouldn't be as strong in the church as I am right now. I mean sure we all know I've had my up's and downs and we all know I spiraled a little out of control on my birthday, but it happened and it's in the past, and the past is where it shall forever stay.
People always ask me how I just up and stop everything all the time. How I stopped drinking and cussing and being wild. The fact of the matter is, is that it was who I was hanging out with, and who I was putting myself around. If I don't surround myself with those types of people then I will never have a problem. As long as I know who I need to be, and as long as I'm around those who I can trust myself to be around, I will be fine. I will keep the commandments that the lord has placed in front of me.

I just need to trust myself in all that I do, and go with it.

Let me just say this...
There are no real rules to how to approach things, forget about the guy codes, and the girl talk. Go with your gut and if you like someone let them know it. Let them know how you feel. If you get rejected then okay, move on to someone else. Play all your cards until you find the right pair. Just live a little. If not for yourself, then for me. Okay?

love -JG

Who am I?

2011-01-20T11:03:00.000-08:00

well for number 29. I love all my pictures and they all make me smile.

so onto the last but not least of my blogger challenge.

WHO AM I?

I am Jessica. 21 years old, proud to be alive and healthy.
I love facebook, and photography, and nerdy guys.
I am a very indecisive person. I over analyze everything.
I really like astrology.
I'm 5 foot 1 inch, and I like guys who are 5 foot 8 inches and taller, no short guys for me.
I am outgoing, fun and adventurous.
I am very very loud.
I love fantasy stuff like Harry Potter and Twilight.
I love the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints.
I read a lesson out of Gospel Principles every night since I don't ever get to go to the class because of my calling. calling equals new member committee.
I have certain things in my life already planned out, like for instance my wedding, I have it all planned.. haha. I get bored sometimes.
I want to date a guy that is sexy, and fun, and serious about life.
I say I'm scared to get married, but I'm really excited about it.
I can not wait to move out of my house.
I say I hate Las Vegas, but deep down inside I love this place.
I have no idea exactly what I want for my career. Honestly I'd love to just be a really great Mom.
I hide my feelings a lot.
I wish I knew how to tell this certain person, I'm way crushing on him, but I can't.
If you think it's you, you're probably wrong.
I wish I was outgoing enough to just walk up to hot guys and talk to them.. I used to be able to do this, but now I just can't.
Secretively I want to get all my tattoos removed. Especially the one on my wrist. It's just too expensive to get done right now.
I ramble a lot.
I'm blonde
I have blue eyes
I have glasses, but I wear my contacts more.
I'm phlebotomy certified, so I can draw your blood.
I love my life.
I wish I skinnier, because I think guys would like me more. haha. so cliche i know.
Some people get mad at me and I just don't understand why they are so immature.
I feel like I'm always broke even when I know I'm not.
This is long. I'm done.
This is who I am, take it or leave it.

Love -JG

Sad days.

2011-01-17T23:45:00.000-08:00

We're told things will only get worse before they get better... I don't know how much worse I can handle.

This weekend was a lot of fun. Good friends, good times.

Sunday just sucked though. My friend Richard Sorensen passed away Sunday afternoon.

I guess I'm just speechless about it all. My head is just pounding away from thinking about everything and replaying all the memories I had with him.

I'll never forget how excited Eddie was for me to meet him. He was nice to me right off the bat, we went on a golf cart ride around the neighborhood after it had rained one day here really bad in Vegas, and then we decided to go mudding in the sand rail, and I'll never forget the booty shorts Richard had on, haha. It was too funny.

I found it socially acceptable to fist pump after meeting Richard, he always had a thing for fist pumping.

Another fun time I had with Richard was when we went swimming at Georgia's house one summer night. There was about 10 of us swimming, and just hanging out, and Richard had on his stunner shades, and I asked him, "Richard it's super dark out, how do you even see in these things." and he goes "I can't, it's just all about having style. you gotta look fly all the time." Which is something Richard definetly had, he had class and style.

There's never a time I saw him, where he didn't give me a compliment on how pretty I looked, or how nice I was dressed. He was always so sweet to me.

We had this thing that whenever we saw each other I'd go OOOOHHHH Richarrrddd, and he'd go OOOOOHHHH Jesssicaaa. haha

I loved it. I loved the bear hugs. I loved the laughter and the joy he brought into my life. I loved him, he was amazing. I'll always cherish all the fun times we had together. I'll never forget his smile, or his humor towards things. He was a dear friend. I'll miss him.

RIP. Richie. I love yah.

That picture is so last year!

2011-01-17T23:20:00.000-08:00

2010 vs 2011

I haven't changed that much..

patience.

2011-01-11T22:16:00.000-08:00

patience is something I need to have way more of. I sometimes tend to jump to conclusions and over analyze a lot of things.

also I bum it too much. I need to just get dressed and then just bum it to bed.

today I did a lot of stuff. I went to work, then went to Holly's, got my car washed and detailed, then we went and got me new windshield wipers, then went to get her sister a birthday present, then went back to Holly's and helped her look at wedding rings and wedding dressed, and skyped with her honey Cameron for a while, then made some funny video messages we sent to my friend Travis, and then I went home and now I'm in bed, ready to sleep.

Time to read my scriptures, pray and go to bed!!

xoxo- JG

A picture of something your afraid of

2011-01-11T22:12:00.000-08:00

I can't even put a picture of a spider on here.. It freaks me out way too much. I'm scared of all spiders. talking about this gives me the heebie geebies lol.

my love life. (haha)

2011-01-10T18:13:00.000-08:00

We all are perfectly aware on here that I haven't dated anyone in a very very long time! In fact it's been almost a year. Which is slightly depressing, but I'm actually doing pretty well. I'm much to blame for being single for so long. & I've definitely made some pretty lousy decisions as well.

Let's start out with my first problem. The initial date. I used to have a major problem going on dates with guys, I would call them a day or a few hours before the date and cancel and/or reschedule. I would just get so scared to go on the date that I'd freak out and just say forget about it. So this year I decided that I'm not canceling, if I feel like I have no interest whatsoever then I will just say no from the beginning. I wouldn't want a guy to do that to me, so I shouldn't do that to a guy.

Now onto my second problem.. or error.. lol. Apparently according to certain friends, I am not a normal Mormon girl. Apparently normal Mormon girls are quiet and small and if you ask me I guess boring, because I'm loud and fun and obnoxious and I've got some TnA.. yes everyone I said TnA. You've gotta give the men out there a little something to look at.. Not a whole lot or anything, but a little bit.. yah know? Okay so anyways with my fault of not being normal, I have to find someone who isn't normal like me.

Which leads my to my third and final problem... well error.. lol. My list... According to some friends I shouldn't have a list of the perfect guy, I should just have standards and go off of that. Well folks, I have a list.. It's not like I wouldn't date someone who didn't fit on it. I'm just saying if I could absolutely have the most perfect guy ever this is what he would entail. I don't feel like sharing my list with the world. But I did find this pretty handsome guy that fit almost all of them.. He only failed on one out of ten. Crazy huh! I never ever thought it was really possible but hey... it worked!

Yup so this is my love life right now.. I still haven't gotten a kiss in 2011 yet.. but I guess it will happen when the right person comes along!

Oh & so the other day I wrote on my status to Rap or to Sing... I'm really feeling like Rapping at the moment.. Singing is just lame.. :D haha

love- JG

A picture of something that means alot to you.

2011-01-10T17:53:00.001-08:00

LIFE.

Honestly life in general is something that I just cherish more than I ever did before. I enjoy the little things, and the big things. The sky and the snow, the clouds, and the moon. The blessings from the church and how fairytale like the temples are. Relationships I'm starting to cherish a lot more too, I'm trying to over come my fear... that'll be in my next blog! I especially cherish photography though, because without it, this blog would not be possible at all. It also has a big impact on my life. I see life in photography, happiness, death, love, joy.. I feel it.

These things mean a lot to me.

day 25

2011-01-08T12:48:00.000-08:00

Picture of someone you wish you could meet someday that has passed away.

First and foremost I wish I could really be present during the first vision, it would be absolutely amazing. I also wish I could meet Heavenly Father & Jesus Christ, in time I will definitely be able to meet both. Also I'd love to meet Joseph & Emma Smith, and just sit down and talk to them a little about their lives and what they have been through, and how the stayed so strong in the church after all the battles they had faced. They truely are all very strong individuals!!

23 & 24!

2011-01-06T13:27:00.001-08:00

The person I've been the closest with for the longest!

Her name is Brianna. We've known each other since we were five. That's 16 years at the moment. She's the closest thing I have to an older sister, and she's awesome. Even if we don't talk every day, we are always there for each other and just a phone call away.

A photo of myself and a family member... I have lots of family though!

So I know I shouldn't talk like this... but these are my thoughts at the moment!

2011-01-06T12:37:00.000-08:00

Okay so this whole growing up and getting married business... it doesn't even freak me out anymore.. which a year ago, I was completely against getting married at my age, but as all my friends are having kids and getting married, in either order I feel as if my time is coming slowly but surely.. All I have to say though, is the man that I marry will have the following qualities... FOR SURE!!

Besides being charming, intelligent, kind, LDS, and handsome.
He will be athletic in some way. Couch potatoes don't fly with me. He will be funny, most definitely have a good sense of humor. Dull conversations are just lame. He will be nerdy... in a good way. I love me some geekyness. && Finally... don't judge me for this. He needs to be sexual, with sexual innuendos and all, and just... stuff i shouldn't even talk about, but he will be like this.

Okay I got it out. I feel better now. I won't be settling for less that this.

:D - JG

HELLO 2011!!!

2011-01-05T18:19:00.000-08:00

Wow!!! It's 2011!! Can you believe that?! So weird!!

August of 2008 is when I started this blog. I was a completely different person then! A complete wild child!! haha. Just going back and seeing all the crazy things I used to do, and act like... It just makes me happy and blessed to know that I got on the right track grew up and changed my life for the better.

This year a lot is going to change!!!

I will have been baptized for a year March 6, 2011. I am so excited for that day! I feel so blessed to be apart of this Church, and I know it's the true church. I think I'm going to have a little fiesta to celebrate or something!

Also this year as long as I don't fall in love and decide to get married before August, I'm going to be moving to Arizona with my second family the Gutierrez's. Mostly just moving into a condo with my best friend Tana!! I'm so excited for this! I just need to get a second job right now and then pay off my car and start saving!!

Getting a Phlebotomy job is my number one concern at the moment, because I want to make it my career!

I will keep updating my 1-30 days tomorrow! I know I'm way behind but I'm happy to say I'll have some time tomorrow to blog some more!

Asta La Vista!! JG

Day 22

2011-01-05T18:01:00.000-08:00

A picture that confuses you

How the freak can you do that?! How does it work!? Someone help!!!

This ones just a cool photo, but I don't understand how it was taken....

Day 21

2011-01-05T17:51:00.000-08:00

A picture of something that makes you happy. :D

Chocolate Chip Cookies!!

Showering!!

Chipoootle - YUMMY - I could eat here everyday!

Disney Movies.. I'm a collector!!

Day 20!

2011-01-05T17:43:00.000-08:00

A picture of somewhere you'd love to travel

Greece

Bahamas!

Europe.. Paris

Day 19!!

2011-01-05T17:37:00.000-08:00

A picture of someone you miss

18. I have about this many favorite shows.

2010-12-16T20:40:00.000-08:00

One Tree Hill. Grey's Anatomy. Gossip Girl. Vampire Diaries. Private Practice. 90210. Secret Life of an American Teenager. Army Wives. Law & Order SVU, NCIS, Criminal Minds, Pretty Little Liars. Big Love.

I used to LOVE. Lost. The Hills. & Laguna Beach.

Day 16 & 17

2010-12-15T17:28:00.000-08:00

Someone you would want to switch lives with for one day and why?

Lauren Conrad. Easy as can be!

Favorite song

This ones difficult. I have a lot of favorite songs. But at the moment this one is my favorite!

Something I want to do before I DIE!

2010-12-13T12:30:00.001-08:00

Playing Catch Up!!

2010-12-12T09:37:00.000-08:00

A picture of the person who has gotten you through the most.

My Momma

A picture of someone you see yourself marrying/being with in the future

Since I don't have a boyfriend... This one was slightly difficult.. So I choose a few pretty awesome guys

Your celebrity crush

I have a few what can I say.

A picture of something you love

I LOVE UTAH & the SNOW!

A picture of something you hate

I don't really hate anything... except for how ugly my bumper looks

Picture of someone you could never imagine your life without

Besides my Heavenly Father... I'd have to definitely go with Bri, Tana & Tara, Leah, Holly, & GARYYYY. They're my true never going to judge me bestest friends ever.

A picture that makes you laugh

2010-12-06T14:11:00.001-08:00

hahaha the first time I ever tried sea food... I was terribly nervous... & I like Phil and LeAnne's faces haha.

A picture of someone/something that has the biggest impact on you!!!

2010-12-04T20:58:00.001-08:00

My Grandparents, My Family, The Church, My Missionaries, My Brother, & My Second Family.

They're all amazing, and they're all a big part of who I am today.

A better version of who I was before!

A picture that shows your TRUE SELF!

2010-12-04T20:55:00.001-08:00

Most definitely.

I'm crazy cool, wacky, fun, and excitingly normal!!!

Somewhere I've Been.

2010-12-02T13:31:00.001-08:00

I'm Well Traveled!

My Senior Trip, with Jessica V, we went to Puerto Vallarta, Mexico!!
It was a very very fun vacation!!

I've been to Coronado, Ca! I go there almost every 4th of July with my family, we just lay around on the beach and have fun! It's amazing!

I've been to Brianhead, UT. With some friends for a church trip! It was of course a blast!! We just went tubing the whole time, and had a lot of fun!

I've been to American Fork, Ut. With some friends for the Festival of Colors, it was amazing as well. I also got to go to the Salt Lake City Temple on this trip, which was a blast!

My last adventure took place in Florida!!! I went to Disney World, Harry Potter World, Epcot, & The Animal Kingdom. Epcot was gorgeous, I really liked it there!

a habit i WISH i DIDN'T have.

2010-12-02T13:27:00.001-08:00

HUMPHHHHH...

A habit I wish I didn't have would have to be my obsession with over analyzing things. I always look into things way too much.

Another habit I wish I didn't have would be buying an excessive amount of clothes. For some reason, I'm obsessed with shirts and stuff, and so I always buy something, and it's just a bad habit I wish I could break. lol

Oh & I wish I didn't like coffee as much as I do. I mean I can definitely go with out drinking it, but I just think it's so yummy.. it's definitely a downfall of mine.

A Photo of Me & My Craziest Friend.

2010-11-30T13:09:00.000-08:00

I have two...

Meet Ashley M.

Not only is she one of my best friends, she's definitely one of my craziest as well. We've had some pretty adventurous times together. & no matter what we can always call each other if we need someone to vent to or cry to. We once took a 15 hour trip to Huntington, to just go to the beach for a little while. Longest road trip of my life, being awake for over 24hrs is no fun, but it was one of many adventures with her that I will always remember for the rest of my life.

Meet Leah J.

11 years strong. My wonderful best friend, who has been my neighbor for forever!! I love her like a sister. We've had lots of crazy times together.. More than most people can imagine. She's an amazing person though, and no matter what we'll always be here for one another. Out of all the crazy times the one that stands out the most is when we got into a fight at her house, and she told me to stop flicking her and i didn't and she pushed me in the pool with my brand new shoes on... I was so mad, but now we laugh about it. haha. Good times with the bestie always!

GoodMemory

2010-11-29T13:45:00.000-08:00

Festival Of Colors

It was by far the most fun I've had getting messy ever. I want to go back like every year. I loved it. The whole trip was amazing. I got to see some old friends, and got to hang out with some new friends. The whole weekend was a blast!

It's times like these that make me so thankful to be alive, and to have friends and family, and be able to experience the little things in life.

Anyways, this is just an awesome memory. I hope to be able to share it with other friends who are important to me some day soon! All I know is next year, I will totally be attending this thing again!! & I can't wait!

Photo&15Facts.

2010-11-28T18:11:00.001-08:00

1. I'm addicted to quotes.
2. midnight premiers are my favorite.
3. I'm the only LDS member in my immediate family.
4. I'm a rebel.. without a cause.
5. Sweet Home Alabama is my favorite movie, I can quote the whole thing.
6. I love Fall & Winter, I wish it was like this year round.
7. Snowboarding is my thing I love it.
8. My hair is my favorite thing about myself.
9. Personality wise, I think I have a pretty great one.
10. I've decided that I'm going to be a full time Phlebotomist as soon as I get a job.
11. I work as a Geek Squad Agent, at Best Buy.
12. I want to travel the whole world someday..
13. I'm Italian, Mexican, Irish, & English... So don't get me angry.
14. I love board games, and other fun stuff.
15. I love my friends as if they were my family!

trying to be a better blogger

2010-11-28T18:09:00.001-08:00

Day 01 - A recent photo of you and 15 interesting facts about yourself
Day 02 - A really good memory.
Day 03 - A picture of you and your craziest friend
Day 04 - A habit that you wish you didn't have
Day 05 - A picture of somewhere you've been to
Day 06 - A picture that shows your true self
Day 07 - A picture of someone/something that has the biggest impact on you
Day 08 - A picture that makes you laugh
Day 09 - A picture of the person who has gotten you through the most
Day 10 - A picture of someone you see yourself marrying/being with in the future
Day 11 - Your celebrity crush
Day 12 - A picture of something you love
Day 13 - A picture of something you hate
Day 14 - Picture of someone you could never imagine your life without
Day 15 - A picture of something you want to do before you die
Day 16 - Someone you would want to switch lives w/ for one day and why
Day 17 - Your favorite song
Day 18 - A picture of the cast of your favourite show.
Day 19 - A picture of someone you miss
Day 20 - A picture of somewhere you'd love to travel
Day 21 - A picture of something that makes you happy
Day 22 - A picture that confuses you
Day 23 - A picture of you and the person you have been closest with the longest
Day 24- A picture of yourself and a family member
Day 25 - Picture of someone you wish you could meet someday that has passed away
Day 26 - A picture of something that means alot to you.
Day 27 - A picture of something your afraid of
Day 28 - A picture of you last year and now, how have you changed since then?
Day 29 - A picture that can always make you smile
Day 30 - Who are you?

back to being me.

2010-11-26T02:13:00.000-08:00

So I went to Florida for Halloween with my second family the Gutierrez's. It was so much fun and so amazing. Harry Potter World was everything you could imagine it to be. & Epcot and Disneyworld were amazing as well. It was fun going to the different parks on Halloween and stuff I really enjoyed it! Here are a few pictures below!! :D

I was never really good at being rebellious. THANK GOODNESS!! lol
I've overcame my fear of seeing someone, and I've gone back to church, which was like the best decision I've ever made... I really don't know what I would do with out the Gospel in my life, and my Heavenly Father, & Savior. I just love them sooo much!
Everything's been going much much better, and I feel like a huge weight has been lifted off of my shoulders.

I've even came to realize that I need some goals...

1. Get a Phlebotomy job!!!
2. Save money.
3. Move to Utah.. :D
4. pay off my car & fix my car

That's all I've got so far, but for now I think I'm done going to school and I'm just going to start focusing on my trade.

Also I got my car insurance down by like 20$ bucks!! WAHOOOO!!

So life's great!!
I hope everyone else is doing good!

Long Time No Talk. :/

2010-10-14T20:44:00.000-07:00

let's see where to start out...

I had an amazing birthday week, and now I have 2 weeks till I go to Florida with the most amazing family ever, besides my own.

Life's been pretty good to me so far, no complaints on my end. Besides that I want cheaper insurance. lol. That's my only request.

I love being 21. I feel like I have no boundaries in life anymore. It's amazing.

I have no love interest at the moment, which is making my life a little dull, but I'm sure I'll survive.

I've decided I want to write a book. I've already started it. I think I actually want to write two books because I have two works in progress. I just love to type.

Well I guess I better get back to my stuff.

Much Love till next time

xoxo

Jess

3 days & 30 minutes!!

2010-09-24T23:27:00.000-07:00

I'm becoming obsessed with counting down! I'm so excited!! Here my invitation!! :D

10 days & a webcast?

2010-09-18T15:26:00.000-07:00

I think I'm super excited for my birthday, but I think I'm going to have a webcast. Heres the thing though.. it's going to be about my life... People think they know me, but they don't, and I'm slightly sick of the gossip and rumors, so I think I'm just going to set people straight.. I'm slightly excited.... I may start today, or tonight... hmmmm. i dunno, we'll see :D

18 Days!!!

2010-09-10T21:03:00.000-07:00

18 DAYS & I WILL BE 21!!!!

I am so freakin excited you have no idea! I can not wait! I have it all planned out! If anything about Las Vegas is awesome, it's that when you turn 21 you already have a the clubs and casinos ready for you.. just a short distance away! I just can't wait! I'm sooo stoked! Here's a picture of what the invite looks like for the Big Nights!

I'm going to have the best birthday week ever and I'm so excited!!

Now I just have to find a cute dress to wear!

25 days!!!!!!

2010-09-03T16:29:00.001-07:00

Yes I am totally counting down for my 21st birthday!! I just don't know what to do still, I do have a pretty good idea about it all though! I'm just so excited!!!

But onto a more important topic. School has started! I can't complain I love all my classes and everything is pretty fun!

Lets see boys... well they're is one.. i'm talking to.. so far he's a pretty good friend, so we'll see what happens with that.. I'll most definitely keep you updated as time passes on.

I've decided that I'm a quote kind of girl. Quotes really make me happy, and I just love how someone can put random words together and make them sound beautiful and just how I"m feeling. So from now on I think I'm going to post a quote on here everyday! Well atleast try!

BETTER NEWS!!! READY?!?

Awesome right!?! I'm going to DisneyWorld, Harry Potter World, & Universal Studios!!!! I'm so freakin excited!! We're going over Halloween Weekend!! Which is going to make it that much better!

Well I'll fill you guys in on my life more later! Here's a quote for yah!

"Sometime when you care about someone alot you just know you will make some kind of mistake and you end up losing the person you care the most about but if your lucky you might get a second chance ." - Peyton Sawyer

1 month & 9 days

2010-08-19T13:48:00.000-07:00

I have one month and nine days until my 21st birthday. I've been trying to figure out exactly what to for my big 21st! I want to do something fun! I've never been to a club on the strip before so I'm definitely going to do that!

We're suppose to go to Disneyland, but I don't know if that's still going to happen, which is just so lame.

Life's been really super good lately. I've been in the best moods! I just love it!

Gary & Brady come back this weekend, which should make things pretty interesting, since I haven't seen either of them in two and half months. I definitely know me and Gary will go right back to normal, hopefully. lol. Brady.. uhm not so much. I'm sad it all got turned into such a mess, but I think it's for the best. I really just can't be super close to people I used to like. It's just to hard for me, and I just get really really jealous. Which is probably why I could never cheat on anyone either.

I wrote down some things that I want in a guy last night just being bored, and trying to figure things out for myself. Here are some of them;
1. someone who can make me laugh
2. someone who doesn't have to be up my butt all the time because they have a life of their own as well (attention is great and all, but I like me time too)
3. someone who makes me feel happy all the time and cared for
4. someone who has a CAREER, i'm lacking in that department, but usually boys are more up to speed, and at my age... I need someone a little ahead of the game
5. someone who has a car.
6. someone who likes being in charge, cause i sort of suck at it
* I just want someone who I can date and have fun with before things get serious, someone who understands that I have responsibilities, and other things going on in my life.
* I just need a man, and not a child.

Enough about what I want... I finally fixed my wonderful blog! Which I am so freakin happy about!

Also my hair is getting turned back to blondeeeeee!!! YAYAH! Brown just makes me feel boring, I like blonde, and my roots are coming back in blonde anyways, so it's time to fix up my hurrrrr!

here's a picture of what my hair is going to look like!

It's going to look amazing, because it's my idol Lauren Conrad! I just love her! lol.

Well that's all for me for today!

See you all later!

oh happy day!

2010-08-11T16:39:00.000-07:00

Hey Friends!

Well life's been pretty crazy.. haha NOT! I haven't been up to anything so you havent missed anything. Besides my poor brother getting blisters from having a sunburn! so sad!!

Two weeks and his skin will grow back. They finally all popped today! EWWWWYY!!

He spent the night at his friends house, and his friends parents didn't put sunblock on the kids.. RETARDS!

Anyways on a brighter note I got all my school stuff taken care of which is such a blessing cause I was so worried about it!
I will be taking a photography class, a cooking class, a math class, and a theater class, just to see if I can do anything artistic. Lets hope I can, because I'm still trying to figure out what I'm good at!! lol

Failure

2010-08-08T15:18:00.000-07:00

I am a failure. I missed church again, which is just lameness. I feel so out of loop, and like I can never make it anywhere on time, except for work. I'm just so sleeppppyyy. The rain & lightening last night was super wonderful though, I loved it. This morning felt so good. I love how the weather is after it rains, and it always smells sooooooo good!

Anyways, life's been pretty good. Last night I went and saw the Anthony Cools show it was soooooo cool. My friend Ashley is in the show and she's just so dang pretty.

The next few weekends are going to be busy, everyones getting married and stuff! I'm excited!

I'll keep yah posted!

what to do, what to do.

2010-08-03T15:36:00.000-07:00

Last night I received a very random email from my grandpa. Random enough, that it was exactly everything I needed to hear from someone, and the even more random part was that he just felt like he needed to tell me it.

Things like this, really strengthen my testimony, and my faith in life, and heavenly father. Lately I've felt distant from my friends, from my life, and especially heavenly father. I haven't been reading or praying or anything. I know why and it's cause I feel absolutely miserable for a few things. The other night though a few of my older friends sat me down, and asked me why I was so sad, and why I wasn't happy, and why I chose to be baptized into the church. It was the first time any had asked me who had an opinion to follow, it was really hard to explain what had happen, and that it wasn't for a guy. I helped me out a little bit and strengthened my testimony a little bit. But lately I've been just feeling terrible, and with that I've been sleeping a lot more than usual.. I dunno I just hope I get back to the happy me as soon as possible.

Things that make me happy
1. Vacations
2. Disney Movies
3. Disneyland
4. My brother
5. When people invite me to hang out
6. When I don't feel left out
7. Swinging on the swings
8. Walking and talking with a friend.
9. My tv shows
10. Kissing

My list isn't too long, or too hard to do. Some of it just needs to be helped by others lol.

I need to be this person again
because this person was truly happy.

feeling better

2010-08-01T21:03:00.000-07:00

I'm feeling much better. I really love my family, they make me feel better. I've been doing some thinking, and I think I just need a quick weekend vacation, or something. I need to have some fun!!

under the weather

2010-08-01T13:23:00.001-07:00

Lately I've been a little under the weather, not just sick and tired, but sad too. I want to do something with my life, I want to experience life. I want to move somewhere else and live there, and see how it goes. It's something I really want to. I will be happier, if things change. Won't I?

HSM Marathon

2010-07-29T02:07:00.000-07:00

All today I just watched High School Musical 1, 2, & 3. I had to babysit, and overall I can say it was good to watch them all again. I love HSM. & it's definitely something I enjoy singing to. :D

yes, no, maybe?

2010-07-27T18:51:00.000-07:00

I'm just a simple person who likes answers. I'm not really someone who likes messing around. I like knowing if you like me or not. I hate hate hate when people act stupid, and pretend like they don't know if someone likes them or not. Dating is very lame. I think I'm going to go with notes from now on. I like passing notes they're fun.

This is my rant for now.

More to come.

all that's on my mind

2010-07-27T02:36:00.000-07:00

I wanna plan my birthday trip to Disneyland.

JULY!

2010-07-26T15:39:00.001-07:00

It's July already! Craziness!
Well life's been pretty good recently. I can't really complain about anything. A bunch of my friends are going on missions, getting married, and moving away, which is kind of a bummer, but hey we all gotta move on in life sometime.

Right now I've just been trying to find a new job, getting ready for school, and just been hanging out with my friends. Living the single life, isn't always fun, but it hasn't been too bad recently.

I can't wait till school starts, I'm actually excited. Hopefully I'll do really good.

Other than that, for my birthday in September, I'm going to Disneyland and I'm super excited!!

See yah later! :D

it's JUNE!

2010-06-01T19:36:00.000-07:00

Oh my it's June! That's crazy! The year is half way over! && I'm doing much much better than last time! I haven't been up to much, but that's okay! I'm just very very busy with work, and hopefully, I'll be getting a new job very very very soon!
AHHH I'm happy things are getting better! :D

about to cry

2010-05-28T23:19:00.000-07:00

I'm so sick of being treated disrespectfully. My family just treats me like crap, and I don't know how much more I can take this. I'm expected to babysit my brother, pick/take my 18yr old sister to work, and i'm expected to pay for a babysitter if i want to go out!! I'm pretty sure I haven't had any babies EVER, so why should I have to pay for a babysitter.
I just wish I could afford to move out, or someone would just let me live with them, that wasn't crazy. I wish my grandma was still here, so she would protect me from all of this. I hate having this responsibility.

I pray to get out of this situation all the time, for something in my life to change, and nothing has, and I just wish he would answer my prayer, and stop these tears from running down my face.

This weekend has just been horrible, and it's not even over, and now tomorrow, I have to deal with giving up my bed to my parent's ridiculous friends, and they didn't even ask me if I wanted to give up my room they just expect me to! I'm sooooo mad right now.

I just wish Brady was here. I really do.

All The Shows Are Ending

2010-05-21T22:16:00.000-07:00

This week has been just an overwhelming week for me! Besides Brady & Gary leaving, I've had to deal with all my shows ending too, and today Grey's Anatomy kicked my butt, and I cried the whole way through it. Then after work I watched Leap Year! Such a good movie!
Now I'm just home babysitting my brother. Very boring job. He really doesn't like to listen or anything like that. But oh well. Other than just getting through this week, I still haven't done much. Oh last night I went to Tara's and we played Disney Scene It and we watched The Sound Of Music. It was great, exactly what I needed, a little pick me up!
Now I need some other stuff to preoccupy me... What should I do?!?!

Today's not my day

2010-05-19T21:23:00.000-07:00

I honestly just want to scream or cry right now. Not sure which one would be better. I hate these feelings. I hate feeling like my stomach is in my throat, and all I wanna do is talk to him. But it's not gonna happen. It's not going to happen very often at all. I dunno.... I'm happy he's happy, but I'm not happy he's gone. I really need a pick me up, or something.... I just hate this with a passion.

I think this is my rant for the day. Besides that I just registered my car, and picked up my brother from baseball. That's it.

Three Months

2010-05-18T23:30:00.000-07:00

That's how long I have to wait. Three months! UGH!
I dunno how excited I am about this... Oh wait I'm not. I have to go all summer without seeing Brady... or Gary! I'm quiet sad. Like don't want to leave my room sad!!

I just love them both so much. Most people would say three months is a breeze, which I agree. But I just hope it goes by quick.

I just really hope they sell a lot of security systems, and they just do great. I'm definetly praying for them to have a great outcome, and fasting as well.

In the meantime though, I'm going to get my patriarchal blessing. I'm so excited for it. I think I'm going to have Tara and Tyler go with me, because they're my closest friends besides Gary and Brady.

I need a second job as well. Any ideas?

it's been way too long!

2010-03-26T01:08:00.000-07:00

I feel like it's been years since I've been on here! I feel like a horrible person! But I'm Mormon now! haha! So much as changed!
I got baptized on March 6, 2010 by Gary Hardy, and it went pretty well besides the fact that when he started he said "Jessica Lynn," I stopped him and was like "uhm my middle name is Marie" hahah and everyone started laughing, he was so upset, but it was hilarious. I'm going to have to say getting baptized was the most amazing feeling in the world, and after you come up out of that water your a completely different person! It's amazing!

On March 7, 2010 I got confirmed by Tyler Payne! He just got back from his mission a week prior to that, and his English wasn't all that great, and so I was really really nervous. But Heavenly Father did give us the gift of tongues, and he of course did amazing as usual. Receiving the Holy Ghost has by far been the best part of all of this. Just to know you have a companion with you at all times is amazing. I can't tell you how much this has helped me so far in just the past few weeks I've had it with me!

After that I've just really been working and going to school. Tara had her birthday party too which was extremely fun! But other than that School and Work all the dang time! I've of course went bowling a lot too, definetly something Gary and Brady have got me to do, way more times in the past month than I probably ever have in my life.

This weekend a ton of us are going to Provo, UT to go to the Festival of Colors and I'm so thrilled I couldn't ask for a better way to start my Spring Break! I'm sooo stoked!

But I have to get going to bed! Sorry this update on my life kind of blows, but more to come when I come back!

I'll leave you with some pretty awesome pictures!

so much to tell

2010-02-08T14:08:00.000-08:00

Well since last time I was on here, I was talking about like my first discussion or something of that sense, well a lot has happened in the "Jessica is Converting World"
1. Everyone knows I'm converting, and everyone has their own opinions about it.
2. I AM getting baptized LDS on March 6, 2010, at the Tuley Springs Stake Center.
3. I do believe in the Book of Mormon, and I do believe that Joseph Smith was a Profit, and that he was given the right to restore the church. I believe in it all, and through prayer is how I discovered that. So that is my testimony, though it grows larger everyday. (Way cool stuff huh) (Gary helped me learn how to actually say it, cause i was a bit confused on how to "bear my testimony")
4. I have picked out everything about my baptism, and if Tyler Payne got home sooner, I would be getting baptized sooner.
- True fact, the missionaries love me cause I read the scriptures all the time and i always do what I'm suppose to, and I already know a lot!! WAHOO.
5. I think I officially know more people in our singles ward than Kelsi does, haha, but Kelsi's not really single anymore so it's okay!

Anyways, I went on the singles ward trip to brianhead, it was amazingly fun, I completely enjoyed myself, and spent way too much money, but hey it happens.
Other than just meeting new people and trying to go out all the time, I've been babysitting and working kinda like all the time with tying in studying as much as i can, lol.

But i have to go to class, oh here's my plans for my baptism.

Opening Hymm – Baptism pg100 childrens song book

Opening Prayer – Sister Todd

Talk on Baptism – Kelsi Eliason

Baptism – Me & Gary Hardy
2 Witnesses -
1.Eddie Emery
2.Sawyer Griffith

Talk on the Holy Ghost – Ashley Hydar

Welcoming New Member – Me

Closing Hymm – Do What is Right pg237

Closing Prayer- Sister Kim

Confirmation -
1.Gary Hardy
2.Colton Simons
3.Sawyer Griffith
4.Josh Vines
5.Russell Tonks
6.Eddie Emery
7.Scotty Oswald
8.Tyler Payne
9.Logan Marchant
10.Bishop Leany
11.Tate Eliason
12.Brother Eliason
13.Jason Rounds
14.Brother Hydar
15.Michael Frehner

Wahhhooo I can't wait!

<33
byeeee

It's been a week!

2010-01-27T16:52:00.000-08:00

It's been such a long week since I've been on here oh my gee. hmm lets see what has been going on in my life. The missionaries finally called on like friday I think. I'm meeting with them at Kelsi's in about an hour.

Friday I went bowling with Colton and Sawyer. It was so much fun, we are such dorks. We ended up seeing Jesse and his girlfriend Sierra they bowled with us. It was just overall an exciting night.

Then Saturday me Colton and Sawyer all went to go hit balls at the baseball field, then we went to McDonalds, and saw a bunch of people there, and Ashley came and hung out with us and we played MASH for like hours. Then me and Sawyer decided to pretend to be engaged. It was too funny, people really believed that we were, and it's just cause we got each other in MASH. He also married my sister too in MASH so it was kinda wierd. haha.

Sunday was church. Went to church with Ashley, then we went and hung out at her sisters, their house is fricken awesome, and their kids are too cute. After that we went to game night at Nicks it was fun meeting new people, after that we went to Coleman's, and ended up having a dance party with me Keri, Ashley, and Coleman. We also stayed up super late!

Monday was even better after school I went to FHE, I missed pretty much all of it though, but after that we went to the Red Rock Wards church and played glow in the dark dodge ball, probably the most fun I've had in a long time, haha. It was too funny. I met a super duper lot more people that night! After dodgeball we went to Eddie's house and went hot tubing and swimming in the pool (it's heated) I ended up staying in the hot tub talking until like 4 in the morning. It was a really good talk though, and I learned a lot more stuff. It's easier asking one person a bunch of questions, and getting their take on things. And it always makes me feel better! After that me and ashley just went to her casa and went to sleep.

Tuesday after work I went bowling again with Ashley, Colton, and Sawyer. It was funny cause a whole bunch of people from high school were there too, it was like a mass different year high school reunion. After that we went to Sawyers and watched Gamer, but didn't really end up watching it we all just messed around and Sawyer was super mad at us! haha.

Tonight's Wednesday, and I have my first Missionary Discussion. I'm meeting with Sister Todd, and her companion, and I'm super excited. Though I don't have much to really learn cause of all the questions I've been asking, it'll be exciting to hear it all from a woman's perspective. It's quiet nice that way actually. None the less, I'm extatic.

I'll write more later I have to go get ready!

:D

LIFE!

2010-01-20T22:09:00.000-08:00

So things have been a little weird lately in my life. Not like bad weird or really good weird, just weird.

Monday was a really fun day in my household, we all had the day off with no school or work. So me and my mom started looking through a tub of pictures she found from way back in the day. Then we all decided to go see Sherlock Holmes, it was actually really really good. Very funny. After that we went to Outback Steakhouse, and I got some super yummy ribs! Then it was off to go home and just chill and sleep. It was amazing.

Oh it's been raining for the past few days, and it's been super weird weather.

Tuesday, was a very extremely long day! lol. I woke up and my parents monitor broke on their computer, but I didn't have time to check it. I had to go to court for this Best Buy thing, cause this guy stole this ladies credit card and plead guilty, so lame, and then we got there and it was canceled. So then me and Alyssa went all the way back home. I got ready to go play Best Buy helper to my parents lol. Went to Best Buy twice, for about 5 hours total I think, more hours than I would normally work in a night. lol. After that just went home and relaxed for about an hour. Then I went to Institute with Colton and Sawyer. It's like seminary for adults. It was really good, and Ashley was there! Made it more fun! She all started texting me haha. It was funny. After that we had some snacks and then I went home and relaxed for a little bit and then went to sleep.

Wednesday. Still raining. ALOT. Went to school early to sign some financial aide stuff and then get my direct deposit in so when I get my stuff it'll go straight to my BANK! heck yes! Then on the way home me and my sister got into a huge argument about a ton of stuff!! Like way too much stuff, but especially about how I want to convert to be LDS and get baptized and everything. Super irritating. Then I got home and Kelsi texted me back and the missionaries never called her back either, and she's going out of town this weekend. So I'm going with Colton to the new ward members dinner, and then on Sunday I got Ashley, Colton, and Sawyer going to singles with me, and I think Gary's going to be there but I'm not sure, cause he's going out of town too. Blah! My two firsts are leaving me. lol. But I'm in the hands of fun, good people!

I'm really excited to get baptized. No one gets it. But it's actually something I've wanted for a really long time. Things happen people change, and I'm feelin good! haha. I just hope people don't get to freaked out by it.

Well tomorrow I have work, blah! And lets see how many day's until Zack comes home? hmm... 25 days.. a little less than a month left! Very exciting!! :D

I'm gonna jam and try to get my brothers butt in bed!

I'll write more later!!

<3
Jess

An Interesting Day

2010-01-18T00:41:00.000-08:00

My morning started with taking my best friend Lauren to work, it was interesting waking up and going to work, but not having to go in. When I got home I went back to sleep until about 9 and then Zack called me, we talked for just about a half an hour and then I got up and got ready for church!!

Most of the time people think church is like so serious, which by all means it is. But I had so much flippen fun at church yesterday! It was Gary Me Colton and Kelsi all in a row, and the funniest things were happening, like Kelsi's stomach made the wierdest noises, and Colton started laughing then Kelsi, then me and then of course Gary, her face was bright red, it was soo funny. Then after that we were like singing and Colton was messing up which entitled us to laugh some more. It was just so funny, but so serious and so much fun all at the same time. & I'm so happy Colton decided to come to singles, lol, he's too grown up to be going to family ward, especially if he isn't married! lol. But Ohhh my gee, it was amazing.

Hearing Mikayla speak was awesome, I loved her talk, it made me realize that much more that I can't wait to fully be apart of this church! Ah! So exciting.

Kelsi talked to the missionaries today too, and their going to call me and then we're going to set up some discussions. I'm soooo stoked!!!

Well it's late and I'm going to try to get some rest.

Like I said today was amazing!!

But I'm gonna jam, no school or anything tomorrow, I'm going to try to sleep in and relax, and hope the missionaries call me!!

<33
Jess

Petty Girls. & Romantic Guys.

2010-01-17T01:07:00.000-08:00

See sometimes I just don't get it. When you like someone, why does one girl always have to be ridiculous. Why does one girl have to throw herself out there like an idiot. Honestly if you would of cared more about him, instead of going out and partying every night maybe he would still like you as much as he does me now! Ugh! I just had to get that off my chest. Some girls just make me go crazy!!

So today has been a very special day for me! Zack is coming home early, like on Valentines, and guess who gets to pick him up from the airport?! ME!!! Ah! So happy when he emailed me today and asked me. And he's my Valentine! I just love it! I haven't been this happy in a very long time. And I just know when he gets home it's going to be two very amazing weeks. I hope the days are long, so it'll seem like he's home for longer!

So other than those two things, the past few days have been fun! Just went shopping like I said with Kelsi, and then hung out with my sister and brother, then today I went with my brother to return and get money for my old books at CSN. After that just went home and watched Post Grad! It was so cute! I loved it! Then lovely work. lol. Now I'm watching house about to write Zack back, and then I'm off to bed. Church in the AM. I think it's time to start making some dates to have some missionary discussions! I'm too thrilled!! :D

Well I'll write more later!

<33
Jess

Greys is Back!!!!!

2010-01-14T21:23:00.001-08:00

I just realized Grey's is back on! Oh my gee!!! Thank goodness for tivo!

Well today was a great day again! Talk to my lover face Zack, his dates got changed and guess what!? He's going to be my Valentine! Ah I'm so excited!

Well I have to go watch Grey's! Going shopping with Kelsi in the morning, and then ordering my books for school! Pay day needs to be like everyday!

xoxoxooxoxoxox
jess

Oh My Gee!

2010-01-13T19:15:00.000-08:00

Lets see where do I start..

Last night I went to this volleyball thing with Kelsi. Leah showed up to sit with me cause I wasn't really wearing the right attire to play, which if I was I probably would of played and it would of been a lot of fun, but oh well. Gary was there too. Kelsi and Gary are like my only Mormon friends right now, since all the rest of them are either going to school in Utah or Idaho, or they are on their missions. Crazy thing, but most are coming back soon, and it'll be way cool and way nice! So anyways I'm sitting there watching everyone playing, and then I see Russell walk in from across the room, I haven't seen him since high school! It was too funny. I like seeing people from high school though, it's always nice to know that they're doing well, and all that jazz, it was a nice surprise for everyone!

Today I woke up to a phone call from Zack, it was the best wake up call I've probably ever gotten, so sweet, and too cute! After we talked for about an hour I went and got ready and went to school. It was a good day at school. For lunch we went and ate at Chipotle, it was amazing! It was me, Whitney, Bri, Kristin, and we saw Katy there which was nice as well. The more people are finding out that I went to church on Sunday, the more biases their opinions start to get! It's pretty insane. But I'm going to do what I feel is right, and I'm going to make the decisions I believe in.

That's just how it's going to go people! lol.

So yes I'm going to church on Sunday this week. :D

I'll write more later!!

xoxo
Jess

Sleep Deprevation Here We Go!!

2010-01-13T02:16:00.000-08:00

Don't you just love the start of a new semester, there's nothing like it! haha.

Well I've perfected my profile to the core for now, I'm not switching anything eventhough the colors don't match, I don't even care lol. All I want to do right now, is finish talking to Zack, and then head to bed!

Tomorrow I only have school until 3:45 which is awesome! And I'm going with Kristin to get Chipotle after my morning break!

I LOVE UNLV. Like already to the core. It's going to be amazing!

I'm just so happy my life is all coming together.

Oh first day of school was bomb, totally dressed up and everything like a nerd! Now tomorrow I'm wearing just jeans and t-shirt. Normal status!! haha.

Tonight I went to this church volleyball thing with Kelsi, and Gary was there, and then all of the sudden Russell was there, I haven't seen him in years!! It was good, everytime I go out I see more and more people, and they're all really happy of my decisions I've been making. Eventhough I'm keeping them on the downlow right now. You all will find out eventually!!

But I have to get to bed!!

xoxo
Jess

Sorry!!

2010-01-13T01:05:00.000-08:00

Sorry my page is such a mess, I'm trying to get it functioning! And I'm going to for sure write in it tomorrow night, like a real blog entree!

Ohhhh my goodness my preview keeps playing, and Zack is talking to me right now, ahhhhh makes me soooooo excited!

Okay well I just thought I'd add that! but yah my blog is under construction!!

blahh

2010-01-12T18:02:00.001-08:00

hey just testing out the font

Church

2010-01-11T00:52:00.000-08:00

Today I went to church with Kelsi Eliason, we went to the church by the Santa Fe, which is the church I used to go to when I was a little kid. Lots of people don't know that I've been to the LDS church lots and lots of times ever since I was 6, and I've been to Youth Conference, and Seminary and everything. lol. I told Kelsi I was a Mormon pro. lol.

Anyways, at church I saw a few random people. I'm happy to say that I saw Gary Hardy though, I haven't seen him since High School, everyone else I see on facebook, or just at random places, but I haven't seen him since High School and it was nice. We didn't really catch up, cause I had to jam for work, but it was still a nice hi.

Church was fun though, well that's how I like to explain it. Many people would say it's joyous, or all that other "churchy" talk, but I like to say it's fun. I like singing and listening to the speakers, it's all very inspirational.

No one get scared though, I'm taking it all one step at a time. I'm not sure what I'm going to do, or choose. It's been apart of my life for like 15 years though so it's hard to not just jump full in. But like I said I need to take my time.

Tomorrow is school, well in about 7 hours I have to wake up, so I should probably get going and head to bed.

I'll write about UNLV tomorrow!

<3
Jess

Church Tomorrow/UNLV MONDAY!

2010-01-09T16:28:00.000-08:00

AHHHH!! I'm so excited. I'm going to church tomorrow with Kelsi. And then school is Monday morning.

I talked to Zack today to. Planning for when he comes home. So excited.

Everything's going great! Now I'm going to go get ready for work :/ blahh.

well I'm sure I'll write more after church & work tomorrow!!

TATA! :D

UNLV/Dear John

2010-01-07T19:01:00.000-08:00

So my life had just got really crazy. My Fasfa didn't completely go through, so now I'm out like a lot of money for school, and it's money my parents don't want to pay for, which makes everything that much more complicated. So sick and tired of them. They really make me angry.

Today I had orientation, and I'm ecstatic about going to UNLV. I just can't wait.

My day besides orientation was spent talking to the most wonderful guy in the world, Zack. I was so happy that I got to talk to him for hours today. Most days he tends to be busy because he's 12 1/2 hours difference from me. He's in Afghanistan, and he's in the Army. I know it all seems wierd and cliche but we have so much in common and so many coincidences keep happening it's all a blur to me, and we're going to go see this movie when he comes home, and I'm ohhhhh soo excited!

I can't wait for it!

Other than that, I'm now just stressing about school money! BLAH!

Happy 2010

2010-01-07T00:58:00.000-08:00

Hey Readers!!

Well I haven't been up to much in the past few days. I've actually been really sick, and I am just now getting better, but I've been getting way too much sleep which is why I'm writing away on here.

My New Years was spent with my brother, and it was a blast lol. Kind of. He's 8, and was all into his video games while I just watched the news, it was fine with me though!

I was going to go to church on Sunday with Kelsi, Ashley G & K, but I was way to sick to even get out of bed. I slept for like 18 hours!

I did make a few random New Years resolutions.

1. No more drinking.
2. No more cussing
3. Go to church
4. Keep my hair brown for the whole year
5. Be happy, try to not let my temper rise
6. Stay updated in school, work, and life as much as possible.
7. See Zack when he gets home from Afghanistan.
8. Make my family proud.

My biggest goal of this year is to go to church and really involve myself in it. I'm super excited to start going, and I know just the return missionary to start talking about it to, I just have to get ahold of him lol.

I'm thinking of moving to Utah too, to go to The U (University of Utah) My grandpa has a house in Layton, and that's not too far from The U, so I'm definetly considering it.

Lots to think about!

Well I have SOAR in the morning (student orientation) at UNLV, wish me luck! I'll write more later!

xo
Jess

Short & Sweet

2009-12-31T14:02:00.000-08:00

So I've really been considering a lot of things lately which usually isn't something I do.

I got accepted to UNLV, so I will be attending there in the spring, and I am oh so excited!

I've actually decided to not participate in any illegal drinking anymore, lol. Sounds dumb but it's definetly a good thing. I haven't done it in a long time anyways, and honestly it just gets me into trouble.

I've decided to redo my room leopard print. It's going to look amazing. And I got a wonderful bookshelf for my room it's amazing as well.

I don't believe in new years resolutions, but this year I'd really like to start going to church. Which church is the question. I don't have a certain faith that I believe in at the moment, though my instincts are saying either Christian or LDS. I'm just going to have to go to church to decide. I just woke up this morning and decided this. Though I've been thinking about it for some time now.

Well I'm off to get ready for work.

Goodbye 2009! You were an eventuful, depressing, exciting, and lovely year.

xoxo
Jess

sometimes

2009-12-03T20:25:00.000-08:00

Sometimes I'm really good at keeping up on this thing, and other times, I just really suck at it! lol.

Not much has changed in the past month. No boys in my life. Schools almost out, and it's nice.

I do think I may have a crush on someone, but I'm not too sure what to think.. lol.

So question, have you ever met someone in your life who is literally a bro hoe? I mean seriously hops from brother to brother. I officially have, and I will not say who this person is, but I will say that I think she is completely disgusting, sleeping with brothers, and multiple brothers is just wrong and sick. I've wanted to say this for soooo long.

Also have you ever met someone who had an issue with drugs, and they just couldn't stop. I wish I could help this person, but they're just so toxic, that I don't want to have anything to do with them. It's not even the fact that I don't have faith for them, cause I do. It's just the fact that at this point in my life I want nothing to do with any of that.

New topic - People say that marrying young is such a bad thing. but honestly I know so many people who are married now, and I'm completely jealous of them! I kinda wish I was getting to pick out my wedding gown and all that jazz, but I'm not. lol. It just amazes me how they find they're one true loves so quick, and it definitely makes me jealous!

I'm done gossiping now about everything I've had on my mind.

but 8000 miles is really really far away huh?

blahhhh tata for now!

Update!

2009-11-16T13:53:00.000-08:00

Wow! it's been a while! lol. Lets see Halloween was a blast!

Well anyways, it was a lot of fun I was a Nurse! haha Go Figure!

Something else everyone should know is that I applied for UNLV for Spring 2010 semester I'm finally ready to go to big kids school lol. And i've never been more excited! it's going to be a new adventure all in it's own, and who knows maybe one day i'll get to go to a university out of state!

other than that holiday season has started at best buy so i don't get any vacation time until jan 1 2010. which is a bummer. And did i mention that i'm sooooo happy all of my friends are coming home and school is almost over! :]

Horrible

2009-10-25T22:04:00.000-07:00

Today has honestly been a horrible day. I really need a new job, or a serious vacation.

goodnight<3

oh goodness

2009-10-24T19:04:00.000-07:00

I'm starting to look more and more forward to writing on this thing. It really does relieve some stress. So lately I've just been super impatient, and just assuming the worst, and I'm not too sure why I've been thinking like that lately! It's no bueno!

I've also been thinking a lot about going to UNLV next semester instead of going there in the Fall. Honestly just getting there now might be more helpful for the fall semester. Plus I'm just sooooo sick and tired of how easy CSN is. It's kind of embarrassing almost to go there, cause it's just that easy, there's no challenge. i hate it!

Tonight I'm just relaxing at home, watching Halloween movies!

I'm excited for Halloween.. I still am not to sure on what I'm going to be though! :/

ta-ta for now!

Weekend Fun

2009-10-19T15:56:00.000-07:00

This weekend was a blast!

Went to Jakes football and kinda volleyball game for his fraternity. I went with my friend Candace. There was a little drama along the way, but those stupid girls are gone now, and theres nothing to worry about.

Heres a few pics from that night!

Most of my weekend was spend just hanging out with Jake, chillen.

Then on Saturday I went to the tailgate! First one at a home game it was a ton of fun!

Now tonight is another football and volleyball game for Jake! Should be tons of fun! :]

ttyl!

xoxo

jess<3

So much to say

2009-10-11T21:00:00.000-07:00

Lets see where should I begin when I have a ton of things going on in my mind.

Lets start with RENO!! It was awesome!

Me and Brittany are officially Scarf Sisters! lol. This is when we were getting ready for the game! :]
This picture of me and Jake is one of my favorites. He was with me when I attended my first tailgate. haha. :]

Hi Moses! We had to hang out with some of the members from the Wolfpack too! Even though I voted for UNLV!

Then Chilis with my fav Leah! I love her oh so much!

Overall the weekend was very very eventful! I loved every moment of it!

So anyways, this past week has been pretty interesting and kinda tough. I feel like for some reason High School is about to repeat itself. I just really wish some girls would grow up. Oh well though theres not much I can do but let the week play itself out. I am really happy with my life right now though, I've pretty much got everything I want and need for the moment. Hopefully things will stay this way for a while! lol.

well enough rumbling from me :]

Randomness

2009-10-07T21:27:00.001-07:00

So i've done alot these past few months. I'm twenty now. I went to my first college football game, went to a fraternity house, went on a few roadtrips, just been having a blast.

tonight i got bored on urbandictionary.com, lol so check out these crazy definitions!

Jessica- she is an amAzing and beautiful girl with the best smile. she has the effect of brightening up someone's day (even just by smiling). she is absolutely adorable. she sometimes says things without thinking, but she's so cute when she does. she's sooo funny. she smells really nice too. in one word, jessica is wonderful.
Here's my totally awesome friend, Jessica!

Greco- A Greek Person or style

Libra Definition -
A Libra is somebody who is SEXY, FUN, and COOL. It is said that Librans should switch attitudes with Capricornians because their look matches them well. Libras look like they haven't a care in the world, but will most likely be the one to run in the burning building to save the trapped and left-behind. They LOVE the lucrative and luxurious! But that doesn't mean they won't give over recieving. Libras have these overwhelming personalities that sometimes lead others the wrong way. Some people don't like Libras because they "seem full of themselves." Which they are, but that doesn't mean they don't care. Librans love people. They love to cheer others up. They can seem annoying, but just don't let them know that you think that. They'll want to hide and cry. They have NOTORIOUS voices. You'll most probably remember a Libra by their voice. Libras make good actors and actresses, writers, columnists, journalists, lawyers, etc. Librans are thinkers. And sometimes, they just... THINK TOO MUCH! Librans need to learn how to let loose. Libras need to learn how to smile (but not too much).

Love Triangle - a twisted love involving two girls after one guy. often results in slapping/punching in face between the girls.

Lust - Often mistaken for love. The intoxicating feeling one gets when around a member of the opposite sex one is attracted to. Purely physical, with no emotional attachment.

Fate - n. an engagement to go out socially with another person, often out of unspoken or unknown romantic interest.

Brohoe- A brohoe is a girl who: -Lives in SoCal: area codes-661, 714, 909, 951, 562 -Likes to chill wit mostly guys but does not neccessarily "fuck them all" like some of you are saying -Thinks lifted trucks and loud bass are hot as fuck -usually has hair dyed blonde on the top and black on the bottom -Listens to mostly fuckin kottonmouth kings and kingspade -REPS KMK, SRH, KINGSPADE, FOX, SKIN IND., FAMOUS, METAL MULISHA, HUSTLER..ETC. -hell yeah are bitches and mainly DGAF -like to go out to the desert and the river -PARTICIPATES IN ONE OR MORE OF THE FOLLOWING: RIDING, SURFING, SNOWBOARDING, SKATEBOARDING, WAKEBOARDING, OTHER SPORTS, ETC. -most wear a lot of make-up and like to get their hair/nails done -usually has piercings and/or tattoos -love animal print -usually wears whatever the fuck she feels like wearing, has a lot of beaters and bandannas -most like to drink, smoke weed, and pop pills -like big sunglasses, purses -usually have hot-ass boyfriends who are usually bros -like to party and just kick it wit their bros -like to shop at No Fear, Zumiez, Tilly's, Pac Sun, etc. -are usually hot or dont give a fuck if they are or not and thats why most girls are jealous and hate them

Frat Guy- Usually in reference to someone who looks like a frat boy, but doesn't act like one. Based purely on the physical aspects, these guys have the frat boy physique, which means a guy dressed well (albeit perhaps a bit abercrombie, a nice mix between prep and hippie) who is tall, athletic, muscular, hunky, and just typically a "guy" in all the right ways. Usually only used by women who happened to be attracted to such guys.
He's so hot, he's got the "frat guy" style going and it looks good on him!

Dumb Blonde - (this ones funny) a girl who looks absolutely gorgeous, great figure, great legs, nice blonde hair (usually bleached). Yet there's something about the peroxide because she just seems to have no sence at all. A lot of guys want to date her and bag her but you can't really "fuck her brains out" if there's nothing up there. She often has a totally blank spaced out look on her pretty face, she is so "out there in the ozone layer" but her looks and vacant air of sexuality may get her around in life (look at some of the entertainment industry's biggest stars today), yet her IQ may be so room temperature that she may not know or comprehend where you "plug it in". Someone may have to tell her. An absolutely vapid dizz. A bad example for females growing up.

Where Have I Been?!

2009-09-04T13:21:00.001-07:00

I feel like I haven't been on here in forever! Hmm where to start?! I went on a few dates with a few random people nothing special obviously.. lol... What else.. Oh did my clinicals at Quest Diagnostics.. Still trying to finish that up!

So basically my life has been CRAZY in the past few weeks.

It all started about a week ago, when Ashley, Courtnee, and I all started hanging out! It began with a party at Ashley's house, that got a little crazy!!! Then we went bowling at 3 in the morning!

we like to call this chapter one! :]

then on thursday i just worked and babysat nothing too fun! Friday hmmmm Friday... let see what did we do... Me and Ashley went to Ozzie Rojas and Ariel Mendoza's back to school party!! Oh what an event that was haha!

Then me and ashley went to my friend Eric & Stevens, to party some more there... and this is what we looked like the next morning!! haha :]

this is chapter two in our lives! haha :]

The next day was pretty fun Me and Ashley and my brother went and saw Final Destination in 3D it was tight!! Ash was scared of the snake haha :]

On Sunday Courtnee got back from going to Cali!! && the adventure was back on! We had another party at ashleys but it was more in control lol! :]

Then we went swimming at the marriot.. no pictures were takin hahah! but it was fun!

On Monday we all woke up very hung over, and we had cuts and bruises all over us! haha. Later on that day we decided to rest because we all needed it!! Tuesday was a different story though. Me and Ash went to town square and did some discount shopping i got like 5 shorts/skirts and a bathing suit for like 60 bucks! it was craziness! Then we picked up court and hung out and drove around to do random things. After that we has some yummy dinner at my casa! They had to meet the parents!! :]

at this point we were at chapter 5 in our crazy lives!! haha :]

Then we didnt have anything to do so at 10pm at night we decided to get up and go to california!! haha and so we did and we had an amazing 16 hour trip! it was a lot of fun! and it was my first road trip with friends!! :]

we concluded this trip as chapters 6 & 7 in our beautiful friendship!!

last night we did kareokee at this kareokee place in china town it was a freakin blast haha :] i loved every bit of it!!

this concludes chapter 8

theses are our best friends bracelets! :]

overall this has been an amazing time so far and I can't wait to see what the future holds for all of us! :]

let me tell you

2009-07-15T18:42:00.000-07:00

So life has been completely interesting as always. Boys are so funny, and it is so funny how they come in and out of our lives. They are all the same though. Well i think I've had this thing for a year now, which is completely crazy cause I never write on here! :/ Never the less I love to update people on my life, so here it goes.

Since the last time I was on here.
I no longer have a boyfriend.

My sister graduated from Shadow Ridge High School!

I've done a lot of partying! lol
I went to try to do my clinicals and they got all messed up.

I went to california again for the fourth of july! It was amazing!
Lastly Harry Potter & the 1/2 blood prince & Transformers 2 were both amazing!

Now all i'm hoping is that new moon will be just as amazing! :]

I've just really been working and going to school. I'm hoping to go on vacation again before the end of summer. A trip to California again, and a camping trip!

heres some pics of my adventures

So how has everyone else been?

sometimes people just dissapoint you

2009-03-01T14:53:00.000-08:00

Where to begin!?! I haven't been on here since 2008! Geeze what have I been doing?!

Lets see... New years was a complete blast I've never had such a fun one, & I've never had such a good new years kiss!! The hotel was amazing! it was soo big and soo pretty!

After new years everything was going good, just registered for classes, and working. Nothing too exciting. Then like a week after school started me and Dakota broke up.. It was hard & it still is hard but i'm living with it.. lol. Theres not much you can do, when you know you want someone, but they're just not ready. I've been taking a phlebotomy class which has been great fun. It's when you learn how to take peoples blood and yah it's exciting. I died my hair back blonde!

I have officially been at best buy for one year on 3/5/09. So i'm excited for that! :D

So back to February. I didn't do anything too special for valentines day, just hung out with my friend nic and we went and saw the uninvited.. sooo trippy never expected the ending to happen like that. Then we went over to our friends to hang out. On the 16 me and Dakota got back together.. for round three. and then we broke up the next day... I guess the third time isn't always a charm. Lol. I dunno what to do about the entire situation, because I want to be with him, but at the same time, it's like I'm just so confused.. Right person.. Wrong time.. maybe that's what it is.. this is my blog and i don't think very many people read it so i'm just going to express somethings that i wouldn't normally tell people. I know me and Dakota can work together, and I know we can make our relationship last. I know it scares him more than anything, especially when he said the other day, "It scares me cause this could be like my last relationship ever, your total mariage material." Now I don't plan on getting married for a few more years, not until my degree is done.. And I'd hate to think that because he's scared to be in love, or to just be with me that that's the reason we're not together.. I'm such a selfish person sometimes, and I just always want.. I never look at what other people want.. I wish he could just see how much I care about him, and how much I want to be there for him through thick and thin, and I know theres so much to this story that no one knows but me and him.. But I just wish he could see.. I've never felt this way before.. sucks. & it is scary..

oh well enough about me rambling about my freakin problems lol. My phlebotomy class ends tomorrow, and we start clinicals on tuesday, and my clinicals are at sunrise hospital where i was born!! I'm too excited. I think i'll be writing on here more.. :]

xoxo

GOODBYE 08 HELLO 09!

2008-12-29T14:24:00.000-08:00

So I'm saying bye to 2008, and I'm going out in style, I've decided that 2008 was not the best year, its ended well though. I brought in the new year last year with one of my best friends Jessica, and her family. Then i continued by going snowboarding with Alysia, and back to school. Then I got a job at Best Buy. I met some awesome people and had an awsome summer until my Grandma got really sick, the day before my dads 40th birthday she died, it was a very tramatic event for my family. Then my birthday and my brothers happened and it just kept feeling like something was missing. Halloween was around the corner and I'd finally start being exclusive with Dakota, and it felt like life had turned around, and ever since then Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas, and ever other day has been amazing! I'm so happy and i don't want anything to change that!

So for this New Years I will be spending it in Las Vegas, on the Strip
with Dakota, Chris, Aaron, Molly & Alex.

We're staying at Trump Towers.

&& I'm very excited. So I'm going out with a bang and in style!! I can't wait to see how it goes! :]

I'll fill you in later!

WOW IT'S BEEN A WHILE!

2008-12-20T18:29:00.000-08:00

ell it's been like 3 months since I've been on this thing! I guess I've been busy with school and finals and everything! But I'm back and in action! & ready to fill you in on my crazy adventurous life!

So we can start with my brothers 7th birthday! Princess Leia & Darth Vader came! It was a very Star Warsy party! lol. But all in all it was lots of fun! :]

Then me and my friend Angie started hanging out a lot, but we didn't just start hanging out with anyone... we started hanging out with some pretty awesome old friends!

While we were hanging out with Nic, Jessica, Ozzie, Sarah Ariel, Sean, & Dakota!

It was halloween season!! You should of seen how much fun we had at the party we went to!! haha

Then I kinda started to go out a lot and do lots of fun things, & I decided to not be boring anymore! thank goodness cause i'm just not a boring person lol!

Since I was going out so much and having so much fun, me and Dakota started dating in the process! :]

Now me and Dakota have a very long history together we met at Heroes Camp in 2005! We just had fun and we're friends, yah know flirted a little... lol.

After Heroes Camp he came to my 16th birthday and that's when we got into the most trouble either of use have ever been in! lol.

But oh well cause the past is the past! && we had a blast doing it! :]

Now with that said.. and the pictures shown... over 3 years later we're together.. and actually happier than ever it's quiet a good thing too cause i haven't had a boy friend in 3 years, so i was definatly due for one! lol :]

So overall since I havent been on here I've been actually having a blast and i'm very very happy!! Wahooo!! :]

TWILIGHT SERIES!!

2008-09-20T22:23:00.000-07:00

k so i finished the series today, and i just think everyone should read it. It's an amazing story, and it's not just about love lol!

ive got a huge biology test in like 10 hours lol

2008-09-15T23:26:00.000-07:00

and i'm studying like crazy trying to get it all cramed in my head, hopefully i'll do ok on it, i don't plan to recieve an A but a B or C would be nice... so i'm on the third book of the twilight series... i absolutley love them i just cant put them down. :]

off to study

missing him.. :]

I'm back. lol

2008-09-13T20:49:00.000-07:00

So I've been gone for a while, just settling into school and work now that i don't have much time to myself. But over the past two weeks I've been pretty busy. To the left there this a picture of me and my grandmother (Nanny), she passed away on September 3, the day before her sons 40th birthday, which would be my dad, so you can only imagine how hard the week was for us, then the funeral was on the 7th, and my moms birthday was on the 8th. So it's just been a really busy while. A lot of our family came into town from all over, Ohio, Cali, Utah, Arizona, & Cali. I was happy to see everyone getting along, my grandmother never let anyone argue, it just wasn't right to her. I tried to stay really strong throughout the week but the day of the funeral i lost it, and couldn't stop crying till the service was over. I love my grandmother very much and I will never lose site of all the happy times we have shared.

Then I started reading the Twilight series, and even though I have been extremely busy i have finished the first book already and now I'm on the second one. It's sooo interesting and the way the characters are portrayed makes you feel like your right there with them on their journey. That's probably why I'm so interested in them lol.

Oh what else, if your wondering who the boy blog was about and the one after that, it was about Matt. A boy I like. and he read my blog and asked who i was talking about and I told him to go read my blog again to find out, and I told him the answer was him so that's the back story to that!

Well I've got to go read and do homework!! Much love!

i have your answer

2008-09-11T20:31:00.000-07:00

Its you..

:)

boys.boys.boys.

2008-08-28T23:28:00.000-07:00

I truly believe in this statement above me. Happiness is a journey, not a destination. You have to find your true happiness, and I honestly believe that it is a journey just like life. I guess you could say that as of right now I am an extremely happy girl. And what I am trying to say is that I think I actually like someone, I know it sounds completely weird and random, and I haven't said anything to anyone about it. But I honestly don't think you need to see someone to like them, I think talking and sharing your likes and dislikes is all you need, you need some kind of solid ground to like someone. But I think the reason I haven't told anyone who or why is because I'm honestly scared of everything that come with the words, "like, crush, love, etc." and basically it's because I'm afraid of rejection and I'm afraid of commitment. Just being hurt in general. Plus the person I have a crush on... well lets just say I know it's not the right time, or place for that matter.. Which blows!!!! Oh well I guess we'll see what happens... that's all we can do. I might just keep you all updated though... maybe just maybe.. lol. Whelp Jimmy's asleep, the dishes are done, and I have work tomorrow, so I'm going to bed. Nighty Night!